Hello there, I am currently in Paris (as usual) and its freezing. As in, FREEEEZING! I think about Texas all the time right now and how I wish I was there experiencing sunshine and warmer temps. But then again I hated not having a winter so I guess I should remember those things I used to wish upon a star for and be happy where I am. But I will still be dreaming of warmer places as I sleep tonight. We haven't really had a winter yet and here it is.... We received our first "snow fall" if you can even call it that, yesterday, and it was specks of white on the streets. There is a bit of ice on the sidewalks and streets so that makes me grateful I am not a taxi driver although I have almost slid on it a few times already. Oh lala.
So, I mentioned about a possible job in the last post and that is a no-go. Every job opportunity that has come my way has fallen right through the cracks and while thats a really frustrating thing to experience multiple times, I am learning to be satisfied in the outcome of my life right now. I'm reading a book right now about learning to be content in all circumstances. It's a hard book to read because its very true to where I am now. I am a believer in God and I believe that God has me in the palm of his hand and he's opening and closing doors for me to be here and these jobs that have not worked out are for a reason and me being unemployed is for a reason and all the lows I am experiencing are for a reason. It doesn't make it easier, it doesn't make it more enjoyable...but that is what I am learning right now. To find joy and peace in all circumstances. Life is a roller coaster ride for everyone. Find me one person who has never been in a valley in some point in their life if you can, but I bet you can't because that doesn't exist. But the task is learning to be content in the hard times as well because those hard times make you a better, stronger person (or they can if you let them) and you can learn to appreciate the things you have and your life during those times as well. This month (meaning last month really) has been a real struggle for me. At first I was so excited to be unemployed thinking it would be a few weeks and I wouldn't have to change my lifestyle. Now it's been 5 weeks (technically longer but we're really only counting the time I've been back in Paris) and not only are my funds depleting but I'm becoming restless and bored. I stay quite busy, fortunately, socializing and keeping in touch with friends, staying involved in church, and just exploring Paris when its not iceberg temps out, but I miss working and making money and honestly, having a routine. All you workers out there are probably wishing you could have a few weeks of unemployment but trust me, while the fun is really fun, it gets boring. And then add to unemployment, homeless and you have my story in a nutshell. I am certainly learning to be humble and I know the saying, "you aren't humble if you can say you are" but its humbling having to ask for favors and stay in other peoples homes and share your friends beds and rely so much on your friends. For me at least. I have learned I am a giver and as much fun as getting gifts is, taking is not something I enjoy. Along with learning to be content in my valley, I am also having to learn the task of gritting my teeth and saying thank you when people so graciously offer to do and give me so much. I sound like a brat saying that but I am an independent person and I find it very hard to have to rely on others for simple things in life. I have learned however that I have been blessed beyond imagination with some really incredible friends and that regardless of my employment or living status, they love and support me and will offer anything they can if I need it. Those are the moments I am having to remember to dwell on when the days seem dark and grey (literally and metaphorically). Better days are ahead and I am eagerly looking forward to them while enjoying the simple moments of today.
On the flip side, I did take a job. small happy dance. I will be working for the family I worked for this summer, Sophie and Louise, for a few weeks. The details are yet to be determined but it is looking like I will be their full time nanny for around 6 weeks. The catch is that the job does not start until the end of the month so I will be patiently waiting (and hopefully looking for other jobs) for these next few weeks and for the time after I am with them. The positives, besides having a job, is that I get to live in the apartment I did this summer, for the time i am working for them. Such a blessing. Even if it is for only 6 weeks, I am looking forward to this 6 weeks.
Tomorrow is the first Sunday of the month which means most of the museums in Paris are free for everyone so I am hopefully ending up at the Pantheon between the 2 church services that I go to now on Sundays. I do not know much about the Pantheon but I will know more after tomorrow. :-) Getting my touristy side out for a few hours.
And I am really looking forward to my wonderful friends, Alyssa and Jenni, coming in March. I cannot wait to see them and have some company and some American hugs and show them the city that I love so much. Only a few more weeks!
Well, its late. Must find my nook under the sheets and hope I stay warm enough to sleep. Thinking I didn't bring enough clothes with me to this friends apartment. oh well.
Love, moi
